There are times you will feel like the world only wants to take from you,
There are time where it will seem there is no point in caring for others,
There will be times where it seems you won’t have time for others,
Give more of it.
There will be times it seems love only gets you hurt,
There will be times life tries to take your smile away,
The world will be become serious in order to silence your laugh,
There will be things that come up to take away your focus,
You will feel that the information you’ve learned is for your own personal advantage
You will feel that you you barely have enough for you to survive or be happy,
There will be times where you feel you are at your wits end about to lose it,
There will be people who hurt you beyond understanding,
There will be circumstances that will seem impossible to overcome,
Overcome them anyway.
There will be times where average feels comfortable,
Leave your comfort zone
There will be people who want you to fit in with the norm of mediocrity,
There will be those who try to hinder your growth,
There will be times you don’t feel qualified to bless others,
This is when you bless the most.
Love y’all, Stay blessed, Grow yourself
Asked some of the female followers of Self Growth what they would like to see changed in their man. Addressing the topics and answering questions.
What’s your position in the “Game” of life? Quick video that goes over the different roles that people play in life when it comes to bringing the game together. A way to analyze it for yourself and make necessary adjustments.
Quick video, giving a perspective on how you can stay positive, despite friction in life.
1.Do you know what an attack looks like?
– Can you recognize why certain things happen to upset you.
– Have you ever had bad things happen, just as life is going good.
– Do you know that you won’t simply be allowed to succeed.
– can you separate emotions in order to think clearly.
– Do you know if someone can flare up a certain emotion they can almost make you act however they want.
– Do you know that most bad decisions are made after an emotional attack.
– Do you know that a lot of great opportunities are missed bc of a lack of control after an attack.
– Have you realized that most attacks are never a physical one (meaning no physical harm done), only mentally and emotionally bc that’s where most people are the weakest.
2. Do you know that there’s an adversary
-Do you know there’s someone who’s against you.
-Do you know there’s someone willing to do anything to keep you drifting in life.
– Do you know it’s going to be a fight to protect your thoughts.
– Do you know there’s someone who influences people around you.
– Do you know there’s someone who wants you to live in fear.
– Do you know there someone who doesn’t ever want you to realize your self worth.
-Do you know there’s someone who wants you to live selfishly.
-Do you know there’s someone who will lie to you to keep you below your abilities.
3. Do you know he wants to keep you distracted
– Have you ever made a positive decision and immediately something goes wrong.
– Have you ever made a decision for long term great and been distracted by temporary good.
– Have close friends done or said hurtful things when you need them?
-Can you recognize a distraction.
-Can you stay focused on the big picture.
– Do you know that hell use family as a distraction.
– Do you know he will use friends as a distraction.
– Do you know that hanging around weak minded non-ambitious people increases your chance of issues. (Because their mind is easier for him to control)
4. Do you know that you playing average makes him happy
– Do you know a mind not focused on a major goal is easier to control.
– Do you know playing on a larger scale influences others to do the same.
– Do you know playing average allows others to do the same.
– Do you know he doesn’t want you at your potential.
– Do you know self confidence scares him bc he can’t fill your head with lies.
5. Do you know that he’s beatable.
– Do you know that he can’t control you if you live in faith.
– Do you know that if you make your self strong with the truth, he can’t prey on your weaknesses.
-Do you know he’s already been beaten.
– Do you know he only has the power you allow him to have in your life.
– Do you know knowing who you are beats him.
– Do you know that knowing who’s you are beats him.
-Do you know he can only distract your purpose, be he can’t stop it.
– Do you know that living in faith makes him powerless.
-Do you know that you are loved.
– Do you know that you are forgiven.
– Do you know that you are worth more then you could ever imagine.
– Do you know that there are plans for you to be prosperous and to live abundantly, and all you have to do is stay faithful.
Stay Blessed, Love y’all, Grow Yourself
Faith/Positive mental Attitude– No matter what your religious belief is. In life, you have to have faith that things will improve, things with turn out right, and that everything will be ok. otherwise. Simply having faith prevents your mind from turning life’s speed bumps into mental mountains. A positive mental attitude is usually formed from faith. But your positive mental attitude is what tells you “that wasn’t so bad” or “I made it and I’m stronger because of it”. You will attract to you the things you think about, that can either be a positive world or a negative one.
2. You wont be able to please everyone – The easier waste to run yourself ragged, is to try to please everyone. If your too bold, people will call you rude, if your too quite you’ll be called a pushover. So if their going to judge you anyways and be unhappy despite your efforts, be you and have fun. The ones that are meant to be with you will walk with you, the ones that aren’t, wont.
3.Its nobody else’s fault – You are where you are in life because of your own actions, thoughts, and beliefs. You may have had negative influences, relationships ect. Here’s the thing though, not overcoming that and moving on with your life to become a better you doesn’t hurt anybody else, it only limits you. Its never a lack of money its a lack of thought process, and if you think your situation is so bad, there are a number of motivational videos, and books from people with similar or worst situations that chose to pick THEMSELVES up.
4.You can make progress or excuses, but you cant make both – This ones pretty self explanatory. But what I want you to think about and ask yourself is “when things go wrong do I spend more time complaining about the problem, or evaluating a way for a solution?” Most people spend all day complaining over an issue that they could have come up with a solution for in 10 minutes. Which way to you spend your time. The best way to resolve this is to eliminate grey area from your life, take responsibility, and address situations. Time will pass either way, its just one way is actually productive.
5.If you want it, give it– If you want something from the world first you have to give it. I know this is contrary to what most people are taught and believe, but this is the way of the world. If you want money, your going to have to learn to give some of it away (sew the seed you want to reap). If you want real friends? You have to be one to someone else first. You want love, loyalty, companionship, good deeds, ect…Sew it….Everything you want, you have in a bag inside of you that you can plant anytime any where. and your harvest will come up. Problem is most people want the harvest without planting the seed, and that’s like saying “fire give me heat, and when your nice and warm ill add some logs”.
6.Smile – Smile for yourself because as soon as your smile, your body triggers something in your mind that says “dude things are ok…look were smiling” and your body becomes relaxed. Even if its just a little bit that can make a world of difference. Like right now you have a current mood. Wherever you are, smile…don’t worry ill wait….you instantly start to feel better. This also give you a warm presence about yourself that attracts people to you. Now, don’t walk around creeper smiling at people but if you have a nice normal smile, you will feel better about yourself and people will be drawn to you. Also your smile my be the sunshine of somebody else’s rainy day. And remember what was said about planting the seed. It may be on your bad day that someone’s smile turns your whole day around.
7.The little things are the big things – With relationships of all kinds, do the small things for people. Small acts of random kindness have the biggest effect on people. Give a compliment, hold the door, notice a change, ect. There are many people walking around who don’t have anyone else to do that for them, and you can be that person.
8.Have meaningful qualified friendships with likeminded people – If you want to have real friendships. Make your friends qualify for them. Not everybody you shake hands with is meant to be your friend. You can be nice, you can be polite, but if your going to be a life leech, I’m going to turn salty.Its not rude, its not snobby, its not anything like that, its the confidence that you bring something to the table, and time is valuable. People will bring you in whatever direction they are going in, so you have to make sure its in the same direction you want to go. Find people who are going the same direction in you in life and push each other to go further.
9.Bring something to the table, if you wanna join the feast – I respect your time, and I also respect my own. I promise to better myself, feel a need, give, add value to, serve, compliment, grow, ect, I will be there every time you need me, I will be reliable, I will be honest, I will tell you that thing you need to hear (with love) sometimes you don’t want to hear it, I am willing to give the shirt off of my back and will do everything in my power to help your dreams come true….now…What do YOU bring to the table. (I actually dare some of yall to have that conversation with a close friend and watch what they say). If you are bringing food (value) to the table and they cant even bring a cup? They gotta go.
10.Fill a void and make a friend – There are people out there right now that if you want to qualify for their world, All you have to do is pay attention. People all have certain needs, and if you can fill that need for them you become priceless, you will have people who you would dream to be around, requesting time around you just because they want that need in their life met. If its a real friend, if its positivity, if its to feel like they can have fun, if its someone who notices the small things, whatever it is, pay attention to the things the people you care about/the relationships you want. Fill the need and gain a friend.
Friends – Are you spending time with people who grow you. Are you spending time with people who stretch you. Do you have people in your life further ahead then you in certain areas that motivate you to improve to get on their level? I’ve heard John Maxwell say “If your the smartest person in the room, then your in the wrong room”. Spend time with people (positively) outside of your comfort zone who push you to do more. How deep are the conversations? Are they the same mundane conversations all the time? If they are, its not necessarily a bad thing, but also know that you trade off time from the routine conversation, and utilize that time towards your dream, because you know you can always come back to have the same conversation. One thing about complacency/familiarity is never to far from the comfort zone and that’s never too far from the last place you saw it. Average conversations are in abundance and available at anytime. Its ok to be selfish with your time to pursue relationships that will move you forward. REAL FRIENDS will understand. (Note) They don’t have to have the same dream, as long as they are supportive.Dedicate time towards getting around successful (not just money wise. I mean quality of life) people. Ask people their goals. Here’s a truthful statement about friendship that you might not like ” Your are the average of the 5 people you surround yourself with the most. Your paths will be similar. So if your friends have goals of never accomplishing anything, and living with no dreams….guess what your future will be something similar”. There’s nothing wrong with having QUALIFIED RELATIONSHIPS. Not everyone who says “hi” to you has to be your friend (be nice, but they yall don’t have to get BFF tattoos). Protect your personal circle like your future depends on it…… Because it does.
Relationships- Now this first one piggy backs with friendships as well because it is important for all relationships (friendships/dating/spouse). SHOW APPRECIATION. So vital to a relationship. Please show appreciation to the people who are important to you. Say thank you, tell them what you appreciate, notice the small things. “The smallest gestures make the biggest impact.” I recommend taking time to read “5 love languages”, because the way people acknowledge receiving appreciation is different. Secondly still piggy backing off friendship as well is having patience, trust, confidence. If they don’t have those three qualities you are signing yourself up for headache and heart break. Here’s why. Without trust (in your or themselves) they will wear down your patience. Without patience they wont take the time to consider trusting situations, or wont have the patience for necessary growth (for themselves or you). And without confidence they will need reassurance in every situation, and this will limit the amount of trust they have for you, which means…UNNECESSARY discussions, explanations, possibly even arguments. Also 5,10, and long term goals are important here as well since this is possibly who your spending your life with. One tip Write out 50 characteristics your looking for in a spouse. They may not have all 50 but you’ll realize what your looking for, what’s important, and most importantly WHAT NOT TO WASTE TIME ON. lastly communicate with the person your in a relationship with. Because contrary to popular beliefs…They are not mind readers….Fellas…tell her how you feel…Ladies (depending on the guy)…not as much…reason being. Men want respect more then they want love…So you saying it without showing it (with respect) is wasting time.
Family – Love your family they are the only one you will have. Make time for your family they are the only one you will have. Make memories with your family, because there may be a time where that’s what you have. Realize the importance of family. They will make mistakes, but give grace the same way you would want them to have grace for you. Know that friends will come and go but family (the way they should be) will always be there. Uplift family, Support family (doesn’t always have to be a hand out…can just be a hand up). Love your family. Help your family progress along. If you didn’t do anything that will move 2 generations of your family further then where you started. You were selfish and wasted your time with your family. Lastly always let your family know their importance, that they have priority, that you love them unconditionally, because they are your family and they are the only one you have.
Love yall, Grow yourself, stay blessed.
What if there were sign for your happiness. What if there were clues for your purpose.signs for your relationships. If could show you there’s force that doesn’t want you to realize what your capable of would you take time listen or would you continue to ignore the signs placed in front of you. It is my belief the life is made more complicated because while most people navigate the road of life they miss the road signs of happiness because they are focused on their own problems. So to help I propose looking at three aspects of life and asking yourself “what if” these were signs.
First aspect I ask you to look at is your purpose of being here. We are all born with the seeds of greatness inside of us and I feel it is extremely difficult for that seed to germinate under florescent lighting and in a cubicle. Personal opinion aside though. What if there were signs? What if the feeling you got when you have to wake up to pursue someone else’s dream was something trying to tell you that you should be pursuing your own. What if that same energy you get when you are leaving work or on a Friday, was a sign of the energy your suppose to have throughout life when your pursuing your passion. What if that smile and glow that the “lucky ones who made it” have, was there to show you the glow your suppose to have when your doing what you were made to do? 3 John 1:2 says “Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.” So if your not what happy and prospering, what if its because your not pursing your not fulfilling your duty. What if there were people put into your life that are waiting for you to decide to pursue your dreams so they can help you become great, yet they are standing right outside of the place that has become your comfort zone. What if they were even guaranteed to be there but it was up to you to get out of your own way and step out on faith to find them? What if?
Secondly I think looking at relationships is another place that I feel clues are left for those who take the time to pay attention. My personal opinion is that most people get caught up in the great area that blankets relationships/friendships and it is in this simple action that people conduct their own symphony of stress and misery. What if you looked at friendships by a simple filtering process “Are the a plus or a minus to my life” or “are they a helping me accomplish my goals or taking me away from my goals” (any filter question is fine the point is to put this person on one side of the fence or the other). Psalm 133 says “Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell in unity!”. Not how stressful. So what if the constant bickering, the drama, the fear, the games ect, what if all that was signs that these people shouldn’t be involved in your life, either as much or at all. What if the repeat conflicts that saturate a relationship was a messaging saying “you will continue to have these problems until you realize im trying to tell you this person doesn’t belong in your life (this much/at all)”.If and just saying If you used this filtering and knew this was going on would you allow the life leeches to continue to suck you dry or would you leave the stagnant pool of that friendship?
Lastly and this is going to stretch a lot of y’all so I need you to pay close attention to this one. What if there was a force/adversary/power (whatever you wanna call the devil…to fill in the blank go right ahead). What if he didn’t want you to accomplish your purpose? What if he was afraid of men and women knowing their actual value, because if they knew their value they would not allow themselves to live a certain way. What if he knew that if we recognized that we are sons and daughters of a king, that we had the power to change lives, that it would take away from the chaos he wanted to create. What if he knew these things so he went above and beyond to distract us. What if he used fear? what if he used guilt? What if he used familiar faces? What if he knew that he could use family and friends to distract you from your goals and use guilt to hold you back because if you went focused on what you really wanted, you would impact millions? What if he used those around you to say things or do things to occupy enough space in your mind that it trumps that part that would be focusing on your goals? What if the reason “something comes up” every time you make up your mind to make yourself better, its because he wants to keep you down, yet if you stopped allowing yourself to be weak (sorry just honest) you could overcome whatever he put in front of you and go on to be great? What if he banned talking about these things in businesses and schools because he knew people were lazy and the only way to find out these truths would be to go out of their way and find it in books, bc he knew majority of the population would never do it? What if?
What if we all have a choice? What if we all chose to step up and play the game of life at a higher level? What if we let go of fear? what if we let go of anger? What if we let go of guilt? How great could we be? What if more people started paying attention to the signs in front of them. What if you lived a life outside of your comfort zone, and chose to change lives or at least pursue your dreams. Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” What if he was telling the truth? What if?